Emotional Manipulation
As the chaos generated from the planetary ascension accelerates, many people are being influenced by negative forces that they do not comprehend. Some of these negative forces are sourcing from peoples own Unconscious Mind and Negative Ego which has reinforced a lifetime of negative habits and behaviors. When people feel unsafe and insecure in themselves they will easily resort to controlling and manipulating behaviors. It is helpful to educate oneself about this behavior in order to protect oneself and create the necessary healthy boundaries.
Controlling people will always assume that their needs, desires, wants and purposes are always more important than whatever yours may be. Whatever you may be doing or responsibilities you may have, they assert that you need to focus on them and their issues, regardless of the cost it may incur.
Even though the more sly controlling people may not say that directly, the use of emotional manipulation will tell you that is exactly what they are trying to accomplish. Through emotional manipulation a controlling person will prey upon other people’s empathy and compassion. This is a type of emotional vampire. Controlling behavior runs the gamut in wounded personalities of people that have low self-esteem, fear based thoughts and when these fears are left unchecked, this need to control others may progress into narcissistic and Psychopathic behaviors. One important point to understand about controlling behavior is that it will always lead to some form of psychological or emotional manipulation which promotes deception and lying.
The need to assert Control over others leads to levels of perpetuating forms of Manipulation. The Manipulation of others leads to varying degrees of Deception and Lying.
Control + Manipulation = Deception/Lying.
There is no part of this equation that can be in consent with Krystic forces or god spirit, so this is an imperative piece to master within the self.
What is Emotional Manipulation?
First there are many reasons why people feel the need to control people, places and things, as well as manipulate others to fulfill whatever they believe their personal needs, desires and wishes are. We will bring to the surface the most common issues that are based on wounded egos with very little Self Esteem and therefore little self-sufficiency. People that are controlling will always use manipulation tactics. This may be subtle techniques or progress into master manipulators like many Narcissistic personalities. Manipulation refers to making attempts at indirectly influencing or controlling someone else's behavior or actions. As human beings, our negative emotions often cloud our Discernment making it difficult to see the reality behind hidden agendas or motives in different forms of behavior. The controlling aspects or in depth complexity of perpetuating deceptions are linked to Emotional Manipulation and Lying Techniques and are sometimes very subtle and may be easily overlooked. Many times bad habits have been picked up though a unchecked negative ego of which controlling behaviors are buried under feelings of guilt, low self-esteem, fears and low ethical conduct.
Motivation of Manipulators
What are possible motivations of a Manipulator?
- The need to advance their own purposes and personal gain at virtually any cost to others
- a strong need to attain feelings of acceptance, power and superiority in relationships with others
- a want and need to feel in control of surroundings and people (aka. control freak)a desire to gain a feeling of power over others in order to raise their perception of self-esteem and value in the world they create
- A childlike need to get whatever they want from self-entitlement and no impulse control
- To release inner anxiety and fear through projecting obligations on others to meet personal needs
- boredom, or growing tired of his/her surroundings, wanting to be entertained or pre-occupied in drama
Cause of Manipulation
Why do some people resort to emotional Manipulation so easily?
When a human being has never been able to grow up from childhood into adulthood with healthy loving parents that support self-esteem, instill a core self and know how to create healthy boundaries, they are easily manipulated from their own pain. When someone is easily manipulated from unhealed trauma, abuse, wounds and lack of self-love, they grow into a sophisticated adult manipulator with an immature and wounded emotional (pain) body. Many people appear to be adults but are severely emotionally wounded and revert to very immature childlike emotional states. Severe emotional wounds create a disconnection from the feeling body of the soul and spirit. Generally the age where the most traumas have been left unhealed from childhood, is the age where the adult will revert to when that wound is triggered in their adult life. When that wound is triggered, most of the time rather than take responsibility for that pain, the person will project the need to manipulate others as the cause of their pain to get what they want. One may observe a person acting like a small child having a tantrum to get what they want. Any parent can tell you what it’s like to have a toddler at two years of age, screaming “Mine!, Gimme!”. This is one reason we observe many adults acting like emotional children, when they do not get their way or they cannot control the environment to get something they want.
Most sane people understand that pretending to act to feel a certain way, or toying with another person's emotions, is morally unethical. But some people are so concerned with what they want and have such an inflated concept of their own importance that they have no conscience about manipulating or deceiving others. Worse yet, some people have severe psychological schisms that create personality disorders that may actually play manipulation games for fun or amusement. When dealing with narcissists or psychopaths, it is very important to remember that they are capable of master manipulation techniques and to protect oneself against their antics.The important first step is to set healthy boundaries and to not accept others people’s emotional manipulations and dramas as your priority in life, as they will assert.It is important to be a loving, compassionate and caring human being, but not a doormat to be kicked around through the psychic vampirism that is a direct result of emotional and psychological manipulation.Many techniques of emotional manipulation are very clever, and one can be bewildered by the layers of complex deceit. However, the more educated one becomes, the easier it is to have awareness of this behavior in others and to stop it from occurring in oneself. When we dedicate ourselves to the Krystic pathway we must consciously stop the use of manipulation techniques and controlling behaviors over others. This will minimize the likelihood of someone using emotional manipulation repeatedly to vampirize energies or control one’s sense of empathy for others. We each have the right to defend our own sense of space that belongs to us, and have the capacity to exist without being used as a doormat for others manipulation. The dark Controllers clearly disagree with this freedom and are promoters of these very same manipulation techniques.
Common Manipulation Techniques
What are some of the most common Manipulation techniques?
LYING: It is important to notice that people will frequently lie about things; maybe it seems to be a “little white lie” or is very ambiguous with what they are saying. They may exaggerate to make something seem what it is really not. This is so that you question your own ability to remember the facts and to lean towards trusting what the manipulator is saying even when it’s a lie. When one is dealing with a master manipulator it is useful to take notes or even record the conversation in so that you memorialize what has been said, as well as make it available to others around you in so that there are witnesses to the event. It is important to not allow a manipulator and controller type person to have any direct authoritative power that is not seen or accountable to others.
GUILT TRIPS: Most everyone knows what it feels like to be guilt tripped by another person; usually we learn this behavior early from a family member. However, many manipulators are advanced with clever guilt trips when a person is open hearted and compassionate. Generally it’s about making you feel bad or sorry for something that may not even be something you did or are responsible for. Open hearted and caring, giving people have to remember our feelings and our energies matter too. Many times what you can give is not enough so a guilt trip is to tell you what a bad person you are because you did not give the manipulator what they wanted, when they wanted it. I have found many times if I do not jump when someone else says jump, they will lay on a guilt trip with some kind of manipulation. This happens a lot in the spiritual communities.
BEING VAGUE TO CONFUSE: It is obvious that many techniques of manipulation are sneaky and underhanded. The manipulator may communicate in confusing terms and unclear manners that are hard to follow or understand. They may be passive-aggressive or aligning colleagues or friends into an agenda against you. In this example, in every way attempt to communicate openly, transparently, and as honestly as it’s possible to all that may be involved. This method to create confusion and doubt happens in the hidden whispering of gossip and triangulation, usually manipulations like this are behind the scenes or in the shadows. Bring the facts to the light and speak clearly and transparently, tell the manipulator to take a hike. Bring awareness to the importance of engendering open communications between people that are required to build trust.
PRETENDING TO WANT TO HELP: This is a big issue in any group, community or organizational setting. Certainly this is a painful issue we have dealt with here in the ES community. Manipulators and control freaks actually like to pretend to be helpful even though that is not really their real motivation. What they really want is a sense of control over something or access to someone. It may be that there is some power trip, status or personal goal that is believed can be achieved by pretending to be helpful to someone else. Many times these people create a lot of destruction and extra work in the guise of” being helpful”. Then when the person/organization who is supposed to be receiving the help is getting a bunch of extra problems, the person uses guilt trips to say how unappreciated and undervalued they really are. Open communication and assessment of qualifications and emotional maturity are a must in any organization which concerns a group.
NO ACCOUNTABILITY: When we understand how manipulation works, we want to discern the situation or person for Accountability. Manipulators will always blame others for their misdeeds, bad behavior or misfortune. If they are progressed to narcissism, they may believe they are perfect and beyond reproach. Stopping the blaming game of manipulators is the key to preventing this kind of deception to take hold. If a person starts with shameless blaming or making it your fault when its clearly not, do not be intimidated and tell the truth.
DOUBLESPEAK: Manipulators like to take any statement that has been said and turn it around or twist its meaning in order to use it against you. Usually with manipulators that are good with Doublespeak the conversation will be mixed with ambiguous and confusing language that together when it all adds up does not make any logical sense. Many times it’s a lot of words, with no meaning or substance. Sometimes a part of it may make sense but the rest of the conversation has no connection to what has been said. Doublespeak is a lack of coherence, the person may come off as intelligent using certain words, but they are either confused or attempting to confuse others away from seeing the truth. You may have listened to this person talk for an hour, and have no idea what the point really was in the conversation. This may also happen a lot in relationships with close emotional bonds and will effectively destroy the trust and intimacy between people. When we use private or vulnerable issues and we use as a weapon for Doublespeak, it is emotionally damaging. Speaking what you mean and expressing clear, accurate words, is extremely important. Say what you mean and do what you say.
PSYCHIC VAMPIRE: A psychic vampire is a person who drain others energies and may intentionally drain any positive energy or happiness in another. Manipulation tactics to make a generally happy person feel bad or to take their energy away, the vampire will use condescending or belittling behavior. They may use intimidation and bullying to make another feel unsafe, or completely dependent on them. Generally these people put others on edge, where one feels they must walk on egg shells to not upset this person, or get their wrath. You may not know what sets them off at any moment. If you notice the energy wither away whenever a certain person walks into the room, you should protect yourself and amplify your 12D Shield.
Creating healthy boundaries and being able to exist in one’s space where one can breathe easy, relax and feel comfortable to be themselves, is everyone’s right. Many times as loving and krystic beings we forget to take care of ourselves in the face of demanding, controlling or manipulating people. This is an important time to take care of oneself and to note that this controlling and manipulating phenomena will increase in the environment due to fear, insecurity and confusion in the masses. Many people are having emotional traumas and tantrums as they revert into childlike behavior. The dark forces take advantage of that vulnerability in people whom have not made an effort to understand and clear their negative ego. These people are prime motivation for dark force manipulation that comes with a person that has bad habits of Emotional Manipulation. As you become aware of how emotional manipulation works, pay attention to stop all manipulating behaviors in yourself. This is critical at this time.With a Loving heart, Lisa
References
(Source adapted from research material at: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation, www.wikihow.com/Pick-Up-on-Manipulative-Behavior, yahoo.com/emotional-manipulation-protect-yourself-8831699.html)