Healthy Boundaries: Difference between revisions

When we are more competent in [[Emotional Self-Regulation]] our inner safety is enhanced so that more trust can be formed and we discover that we really do have the resources inside of us for feeling more comfort and feeling safe. Now, sometimes we're going to need to maintain healthy boundaries in order to feel more safe and centred especially when in a group situation or difficult family situations. It could be any kind of situation. “Healthy boundaries” is a must. So, think about how you're feeling when you're around a person who drains you, pushes your buttons maybe consciously or unconsciously to upset you, someone with whom you feel you may easily lose your centre maybe lose your [[Impulse Control]]. Sometimes this happens when people are controlling, they're pushy, they're manipulating or they're demanding of our time and energy. How does this feel in your body? How does it feel in your mind? How does the presence of this particular person actually affect you?

Additionally grounding oneself is similar as the way a tree is sinking her roots deeply in the earth to stay secure in a storm. This is also a tool in creating healthy boundaries - finding the inner stillness is what allows peace to nurture the inner connection within ourselves finding our centre and spiritual core. So, our grounding root system is both our anchor and supports the maintenance of a strong boundary system. It keeps us from being blown about in other people's winds. We must learn to better compassionately witness other people's emotional dramas and pain without allowing their pain and chaos to impact our own energies or direction. Learning to identify escalating emotional dramas in narcissistic behaviour gives us a way to disengage from the external chaos from allowing it to impact us. When we are inwardly focused and we become still within in order to connect with our heart and feel into our deeper intuition. This is the process that keeps one steady, inner connected and focused.

So, finding the inner core to ground when self has strong boundaries can happen in many ways. Here in our community we suggest acclimating to the [[ES Core Triad]] as a dedicated daily practise but there are some other ideas maybe saying a prayer and setting positive intentions every day, offering your blessings over you morning meal or dinner and repeating positive affirmations in your head as you go through your day. Try different ways and find the tool that works for you. Again, one of my favourites is always I am God, I am Sovereign, I am Free.

Take notice of people and places that tend to drain you. Find neutrality in that situation by intending to connect with the inner [[Compassionate Witness]]. Just observe without judgement or reaction. Do not engage yet set appropriate boundaries. Before entering those places or exposing yourself to people whom you have a draining or vampiric sensation take a few minutes to fortify yourself and amplify your personal shield. Think of it as your inner energy space that will only allow love and positivity within it deflecting anything else. Focus on the [[Spirits of Christ]] as being inside your [[12D Shield]] and this personal space protecting you and guiding you through your path in the day. See it and feel it as the force of it around you. Then recognize what [[Consequence of Actions|action or non-action]] you're required to be responsible to maintain that peaceful inner space by setting healthy and appropriate boundaries.